So, We Meet Again

The first time I met this tree, I fell head-over-heels in love with it.

Simply gorgeous tree. Look at those broad green leaves! Look at the graceful overall shape! Look at the FLOWERS!

When I first met it, I remember lying on my back and staring up into its leaves and flowers, practically hypnotized by it. And for some reason, no one could tell me what its name was (which was ridiculously ironic, seeing how I was working as a "gardener" for BYU Grounds at the time, and none of the head "gardeners" could tell me the name of one tree). It took me nine years before I finally learned that it is called the Indian Bean Tree or Catalpa (the name is misleading: it is not a transplant from India--it is native to the US).

Here's a close-up of the flowers:
I mean, really, could a tree be any more beautiful? I was enthralled.

Until I had a dream about it.

See, my subconscious regularly produces a carnival of odd and flashy images for my nighttime enjoyment. Take, for example, the Barbie Wheel o' Destruction1, the Magical Flying Church Pew2, The Time-Traveling Tent of Whiteness3, or Elisa versus the 1000 Legolases4. It even messes up the simple exercise of counting sheep5.

My subconscious also has a nasty habit of taking things that I find beautiful and wonderful and changing them into something that is horrible and terrifying6. (Why it plays such a mean trick is between me and my subconscious, but I'm getting wise to that sucker.)

It took this beautiful tree and had each flower dipped in blood and burning with a flame that consumed nothing. That's it. Just a really freaky symbol7. Oh, and did I mention the overwhelming sense of EVIL I felt in my dream?

Thanks a lot, subconscious. I've never been able to look at this tree the same way since. *shudder*

P.S. Oct 10: I just found a contest for "things that scare you" and I just entered this post. Maybe you should post something, too! (Just don't neglect my contests...)

1. Yes, I'm serious. Picture a monster truck arena, spotlights flashing all over the place, and the announcer booms, "AND NOW PRESENTING THE BARBIE WHEEL O' DESTRUCTION!!!" And it appears: something like a tractor with a humongous hamster wheel attached to the front, and inside the wheel are trapped many scantily-clad, heavily-makeuped women. Angry women. Then more gates open up in the sides of the arena, and many terrified young men named Ken are released into the arena. And the Barbie Wheel o' Destruction chases after each, and the women rip him to shreds while shouting rather lewd and degrading things at him. Yes, I did have some huge issues with feminism and men in my life; yes, I have been to therapy; and no, I am not making this dream up.
2. I had a dream about being bored at church. And I found two buttons under the seat. I pressed one, and the pew shot straight up through the ceiling and flew me all the way to my grandma's house in Peru. I don't have a grandmother who lives in Peru, but that's dreams for ya.
3. Yup. You went in to the tent. It was very white. When you came out again, you were in a different time. No biggie.
4. I really enjoyed this one. My friend Elisa (hi, dear! I see you lurking!!), like so many others, was smitten by the loveliness that is Orlando Bloom. I had a dream that was populated with nothing but Legolases: there were good ones, mean ones, punk ones (mohawks and all), rogue ones (buzzed heads), cowards and heroes, even a female version of Legolas: but they were all Legolas. And poor Elisa was sitting in a corner wringing her hands because she couldn't decide which one she wanted.
5. You'd think counting sheep would be simple. Sheep jump over a fence, one by one, and they each have a number on them. No big deal, right? But sheep #8 did a backflip, and sheep #9 levitated right over. Which surprised me so much I laughed myself right out of my near-sleep state.
6. Don't ask me about my dreams about carnivals or grandfather clocks. Eek.
7. And I've tried looking it up, too. But I never did find out what it was supposed to mean. Maybe in another nine years?