Wednesday, September 26, 2007

I Made You Something

Once Upon a Time...
Wynne was a dork who managed to coerce two coworkers into dressing up together for Halloween. They were the Three Fates. (There they are--aren't they adorable? That's Clotho, Lachesis, and Atropos. See how they very thoughtfully wore name tags so that all the illiterate would know who they were dressed up as?)

The Three Fates had a wonderful time decorating their office, passing out pamphlets to every person who worked in the building, and during their lunch hour, told any mortal who wanted to know THEIR FATE.

Much fun was had by all.

The End.

Or is it? I was thinking about how much fun I had this particular Halloween, and I thought, that perhaps, I could find a way to do something similar over the Internet.

And so, if you'd like to waste just a few minutes of your time, please click on the link below. (Please. Remember, I made it just for you.)



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21 comments:

Marie said...

Oooo...yellow silk. I actually have some bright yellow silk fabric at home, so that sounds about right. Pampered pet sounds nice. I hope that starts soon -- there's a lot of daytime TV I'm missing as we speak...I'm ready to be a kept woman.

I'm glad to hear I'll be living a long time.

And apparently I'll experience death by car power window. Except my car doesn't have power windows. So it must be someone else's car, and hopefully that someone else will be a very handsome young man, so that I may die happy.

"Oh, Lennie, I love you so!"

"Right back atcha, Poopsie!" (that's his pet name for me)

"Is it chilly in here? I'm going to roll up the window..."

[SQUISH]

Lisa said...

So sad to learn I will "go first"! That's all I need to know.

Elizabeth-W said...

5 MORE MINUTES??!!! I get five more minutes to live???
And I spend it commenting to you. How sad is that?

You are one of the most clever people I know. All I can think to write about is my dryer.
And did someone perchance call YOU lizard breath? Because that isn't nice.

Kimberly Vanderhorst said...

~sigh~ I've always had skin, but I never thought that would be the end of me.

By the way? I am officially a fan now. You're so freakin' delightful!

Sarah said...

You are my hero. That page is awesome. I'm going to have to link to it closer to Halloween.

Death by ingrown back hair? I think I'd rather now know that. I'm off to get a back wax...


By the way, you can TOTALLY have one of my mix CDs. Just
send a note to me
with your address and I'll pop one in the mail to you tomorrow. Do it.

Anonymous said...

hi wynne:
thanks for the neat and odd comments on my blog tonight silly girl :)

i loved this web page of yours. the "tub toaster!!" was a riot. you made me laugh out loud. i so enjoy you girl.

crazy about you friend,
kathleen :)

wynne said...

Okay, I have a confession. You don't really think I wrote all of these myself, did you? I had lots of help, years ago, from other co-workers (including Miss Marie who got yellow silk from Clotho), and stole jokes freely from David Letterman and the Simpsons.

So don't think I'm all that cool.

Cause I'm not.

You wanna know how I'm gonna die? Of an inflated head, and it will be YOUR FAULT.

Anonymous said...

Aligator skin, lonely but lucky, and I'll be the first to go--pecked to death by chickens. Such fun!

Jennifer B. said...

Decapitated? Well, at least it's not boring. We red vinyl types hate boring.

Melissa said...

BRIGHT PINK SATIN: You're going to be famous. Really, really famous. Can't tell you what for, but I can tell you it won't last, so invest while you still have the money.

Wow - I would love to be famous... but I'm gonna have to hurry it up cause I have...
Only 3 months left.
Bummer.

But really, I'm not worried because I hate seafood. Yep. Hate it. So this as my death...
You will try Denny's all-you-can-eat seafood special.
probably won't happen!

Death by laughter from reading this?? Well now, that's another story!! :D
Didn't you have some self portraits of you with an inflated head??

Sally Anne said...

"You will be crushed by a sardine falling from the sky."

See, I always told my mother that sardines were deadly. At least I have another 75 years in me though.

P.S. The Fates are getting a badge link at my place. Too cute/creepy to be passed up for Halloweeniness.

Luisa Perkins said...

VERY cool.

Dedee said...

Leather?

I'm overdue?

Machete Juggling.

Woe is me!

That was awesome!

Marie said...

I have zero recollection of contributing to this Fates lunacy, though I wish I could claim some writing credits.

I cannot come up with funny things on cue. This means that whatever talent I may have for goofiness is entirely useless in the real world.

Wynne needs no one's help bringing laughter to all. She's the real deal. Real funny, real cool, real unique, real insane.

All bow before Queenie Halloweenie!

Annie Oldham said...

Oh, the memories! I loved that Halloween. One of the best ever. Purple tissue paper, random bits of ribbon, spider webs, and a black cape will never bring me as much pleasure again. Now I just need to watch out for the next pesky Friday the 13th. Perhaps I will research when it happens, so I at least know how long I have...

nic said...

funniest thing ever. and purely because my death may be imminent, i hereby confess that i kept pressing the button until i found several (relatively) enjoyable fates to choose from.

in the event that i perish today, i will all of my future blog ideas to you.

wynne said...

Thanks for coming, and welcome all you new people. (My general policy is to respond to all new comments, except today, I don't want to. I want to do another post instead. So, just so you know, I SEE YOU, you be loved, I get to your blog sometime, HApPy HalLoWeeN.)

Jean Knee said...

that was kewl.
white linen
72
bludgeoned with a bag of stale marshmallows

not bad, well except the marshmallow part

Super Happy Girl said...

Well thank you very much.
I'm going to live until I'm 92 and I'll get flush down by a plane's toilet.

he joke is on the Fate, 'cause I avoid those toilets like the plague.
HA!

elasticwaistbandlady said...

I hope you know that this was one of the best and most clever posts I've ever read.

Anonymous said...

you are hilarious! it doesn't matter that you didn't write all of these answers, look at what fantastic thing you created out of all of this. i would miss you if you died of an inflated or deflated head. tee hee