The Neverending Meme

Falcor says: End it already, you dork.
And enough with the copyright infringement already.

Am I ever going to finish this dumb thing? Maybe never. Here are the first two parts, just in case you are ridiculous enough to want to see them: Part the First, Part the Second.

And here we go with Part the Third:

Five snacks you enjoy:

1. Chocolate dipped in chocolate with a chocolate center
2. Hot chocolate
3. Chocolate to dip in chocolate fondue
4. Do I really have to continue? I LIKE CHOCOLATE A LOT.
5. See previous answers.
   

Five songs that you know all the lyrics:

I don't think there is one song in the world that meets this description. See, I am horrid with lyrics. When I cannot remember how a song goes, I inevitably make it up as I go. Let's take a few hymns out of the hymn book for example:

High on the mountain top, a badger chased a squirrel.
He ate up the squirrel, and belched to all the world:
Now I ate that squirrel, I think I'm gonna hurl,
So BLEEUUCHH!! BARRRFF! (etc.)

Or how about:

Where can I turn for...peas?
Where is my salad?
Where, when my hunger gnaws,
where can I turn?"

(Here comes the lightning. You better duck, or it will get you, too.)

OH! Wait! I thought of one! "I like Traffic Lights" by Monty Python! (Okay, not really, but it's really easy to make it up as you go, because that's kind of the point of the song.)

Wait, I can think of one more. I worked at Aspen Grove* for one summer, and anytime there was a birthday (which was every day) we sang this song to the person unfortunate enough to be born on that day:

HappyBirthday, happy,HappyBirthday Thisisyourdaysohavealotoffun(boomboomboom) We'reallwaitingforthecelebration, forthecelebrationtobegin soblowoutthecandleonyourcakeandmakeawish serveeverybody'sfavoritedish(favoritefishboomboomboom) HappyBirthday,happy,HappyBirthday, HappyBirthdaytoyooooooooouuuuuu!

And we sang it just like that, loud as possible, and as fast as possible, and I think that there were probably 6 different versions that were all sung at the same time. In other words, no one who ever heard it (the victims whose birthday it was, and anyone else in the vicinity, I mean) actually understood what it was that we were singing. I think that might have been the unspoken goal between us staffers forced to sing it.

That's only four songs, but I'm moving on.

Five things you would do if you were a millionaire billionaire gazillionaire:

Oh, I am already sick of this today. I don't know—pay off school loans? Buy a house? Buy Disneyland? How about buying a nature preserve on an island somewhere and bring dinosaurs back to life? I'm sure I could think of many frivolous things to do with that much money, I just don't want to.

Matter of fact, I think Falco is right. I need to end this right now. Hold on, I'm going to go grab something blunt...

Five bad habits:

Blogging. [THUD] Take that, you ridiculous meme! [THUMP] Die, die!

Five things you like doing:

I don't think I even dented it. Let me go get some explosive.

[KABOOM.]

FivE tHinGs yoU wOUld nEveR wEaR agAIn:

Wow. This doesn't want to die. Maybe I can kill it with sarcasm?

1. Any item of clothing that got fish guts smeared on it.
2. Any item of clothing that had any part of any dead animal smeared on it. Especially if I had been rolling in said dead animal. Why I would be doing that, and how I could stand it, I'm not sure, but I'd burn those clothes.
   
3. Diapers.
4. Um...how about more explosive?
   

BOOMKABOOM

...F1v3 f*v0r1te t#$s:

I think I got it. That'll teach memes to mess with me.

Perhaps I should have put a warning at the top of this post warning about untoward violence? Hmm...

*Brigham Young University's Family Camp, Aspen Grove. A lot of families, a lot of mormons, plenty of trees, and mountains. Need I say more? Possibly, but I'll save it for another post.